Holy crap, you guys!

Like, are we having a war or something? I keep hearing explosions and shit. It is freaking me out. How am I supposed to get any rest with all those bombs going off? Good thing I have all that codeine cough syrup to go with my pear vodka. That stuff is good. My friend Calvin told me about it. He is super fab. He always wears argyle socks which is like his signature and you guys all know how I am all about signature things. Like drinkies and shoes and stuff. And now socks, I guess.

I am so looking forward to Friday night. Let me just say that Aeon's band is super-fun. One time, me and Mims went to see him and I took a giant pair of leopard print panties and threw them onstage. It was hysterical. You should have seen Aeon's face, but then he started doing this riff about fat girls and I thought I was going to die it was so funny. Everyone knows fat girls are hilarious. Anyway, I'm trying to think of something to throw at him on Friday night, so if you have any suggestions, please leave them as comments here.

It just crossed my mind that the bombs I'm hearing might be thunder because it has been raining all day. Thank goodness all the people that live on the lake are so rich because the city or whoever keeps the lake the same level all the time. The lakes where poor people live are all flooded and whatever. Stupid poor people. Why do they live on the lake if they are poor? That's not cute at all.

Speaking of not cute, when me and Rhett went out last weekend, I noticed a new trend. And not the plaid thing, this is a new trend that I don't think I can get with. Living under bridges. Like who does that? I don't think that's very cute at all. Some people were living under the bridges on the highway. Can you imagine how loud that is? Like I wouldn't be able to get any sleep, for real and I am all about my sleep as I think I've already told everyone. Anyway, that's a crazy trend that I will not be going for.

So come on out on Friday to Cedar Street. I'll be the one in the peacock satin D'Orsays, drinking my signature drink, of course. See you then!