F.U.R.I.O.U.S

Ok, so I was just sitting here in the atrium, minding my own business when my phone rings. Hellow. It's Rhett. Whom I totally love and actually dreamed that I was dating which was weird because he's like my brother so it was freaky. Anyway, he's all calling because that little Broadway show he's in is going to be sort of nearby - BUT NOT REALLY NEARBY - next week and he wants me to come see it. Like I haven't seen it a zillion times and like it's not in a sort of trashy town with a lot of Babtists. I don't even know what that is, but I do know that I don't care for them. Anyway, I totally told him back in August or September or something that I was NOT going to go see the show up there. Well, tonight he's all calling me going, "Everyone is furious that you aren't coming to see the show." So I was like, "Whatever." Then he started listing off all my fans that are in his little show and I was like, "I didn't really know I had so many fans." I mean, I'm not surprised, hellow, but it made me sort of happy to know I have a bunch of fans on a bus travelling around America, singing and dancing like crazy people. So I was like, "Get me a free ticket and I'll get Harvey to drive me up there." So then Rhett is all, "It's too late, I could have gotten you a seat last week, if you'd told me." I was like, "Whatever! I didn't know I had so many fans! Like if you had told me, I would totally have told you to get me a ticket!" So then he's screaming back at me, "Whatever!!! You told me told me you wouldn't come up there." So then we were both screaming at each other and I guess he drove into a tunnel because he's in Arkansas and I guess they lots of tunnels there - which generally I don't find very cute, because of this right here: His mobile phone dropped me. So then I had to be furious until he called me back and we were screaming at each other again and I was about ready to just hang up on him and he went back into a tunnel. I think it was a different one this time. So then I had to wait to scream at him until he called back, so I killed some time buying a ticket online which was super-easy, I don't even know why I've been making Knute do all my online stuff since it's so easy. Anyway, what was I talking about? Oh yeah, so me and Rhett are furious at each other which is what always happens right before we get together, which is kinda weird. Whatever. It's so boring.

Crazy people scare me

So lately, I think I might have mentioned that there have been protesters outside The Compound. They've been there for like, ever and it is super boring. So today, I was coming back from the tanning salon and they were there, like they are every day and usually I just wave at them. Sometimes I make Gus take them sandwiches because those people are like serious. And it is awesome to have something you believe in you know? Anyway I thought we were cool, but today when I was coming back home, there was this crazy lady standing in the way of the gate, so i was like, "Ummmm. Need you to move, kay? Thanks!" But she just started yelling at me and I was like, "Whoa!" because she was using some bad words like dropping the F-bomb. So I started inching the Mas up to make her move and she started banging on the hood so I was like, "What the fuck?" Like who acts like that? For real. She had really crazy eyes and I was sort of scared. Like mostly the protesters are pretty cool, they know it's Daddy and not me so they are just there you know, out of like commitment or whatever. So I think that's ok. But I didn't sign up for crazy people. I totally don't know what that means since I didn't sign up for ANY people, but whatever. One of my governesses used to say, "I didn't sign up for this!" I hardly ever sign anything, except autographs. Anyway, I got out my iPhone and called Knute and I go, " There are crazy people outside The Compound." So he told me to go drive around the block which is hilarious since we live on a lake and I don't know how you'd drive around the block unless you had a boat or a hovercraft or something. Anyway I guess he called the cops because when I got back from being lost, they were there and they had the crazy protester lady in handcuffs. So I just waved and drove on in. That was way better.

Ok, member these awesome peacock satin D'Orsay evening shoes? Today I found a little satin clutch that matches! I am like, "Could life be any better?" Like everything is perfect!

I also have a new stalker. I think he's a drug addict or maybe a drunk, I don't know. I hope he doesn't get all crazy like all my other stalkers do. That is so boring.

So since Mims and Thad are having to move to Luxembourg, I was thinking maybe I could look for a castle there, since Daddy says I can still have one. I think Luxembourg sounds super cute, too. Like "Luxury". And I am all about luxury. Luxuryembourg. I'm pretty sure Luxuryembourg will have some castles because it is Europe and there are castles all over that place, for reals!

Hey, do my survey!