Wait, what?

Oh. My. God.

So last year, I accidentally was watching TV and I found a show about this super ugly girl who was living in a house with a bunch of whores and strippers and it was totes confusing because I guess they were all lesbertarians because they were always making out and getting drunk and fighting. It made me feel icky. Well, I was accidentally watching TV tonight and that ugly girl is back with a whole different bunch of whores who are wearing swimsuits are bras or something and nothing else. These whores are more drunker and more stupider than the other ones. I think it's new whores, but it could all be the same ones, maybe it's just reruns. TV is super-confusing sometimes. That girl, Bret, wouldn't be quite so ugly if she didn't wear so much make-up. I am all about being natural.

I've pretty much decided to get another nosejob. I mean, I'm so bored I got to do something. Knute tells me to just wait because Washington with Rhett is coming up quick and soon I won't be so bored, but I'm just not sure. He says I gotta wait until after the trip because they won't let me fly with a nosejob, which is crazy because everytime I fly I fly with a nosejob!!! Actually TWO! Sometime I think Knute just makes stuff up to confuse me.

Could My Life Be More Boring?

So I was just rereading my last post and like I was all, 'What?" I hardly remember any of that! Me and Scar aren't fighting anymore, we went shoe shopping on Saturday, so of course we're ok.

My deposition went fine since I couldn't even remember anything! I was all, "I dunno!" to almost every question! That's so hilarious.

My new stalker is totally boring.

My friend Jenn got a herself a friend she's calling Waff which totally enrages me because I had a Waff way before she did and I don't know why everyone has to try to be exactly like me! It's so boring! Meanwhile my "friend" Waff is texting me and calling me "old" and "poopypants" and some crazy stuff like that. I have no idea what the hell is going on with him. Maybe he's gone crazy. Or he's smoking something. Or both.

My friend TS (notice how I didn't put "friend" in "quotation marks" like I did with "Waff") as totally disappeared. Like that movie where the guy gets sucked up by a alien ship! Maybe that was a Simpsons episode, I don't remember. Anyway, if you see TS, tell him I said to drop a celebritard a line, kay?

What else?

Rhett's got a birthday coming up. Something fabulous, I'm sure, I'll let you know.

Other than that my life is totally boring! Totes.