Drama

I don't know why everytime I go somewhere the authorities have to be involved. So yesterday, me and Rhett went down to Houston to see my fiance Bucky. He had a show that was awesome. It's called Like You Like It and you can read about it by clicking on the title where I wrote it like that with the line under it. It's called a "link" or something.

So anyway, me and Rhett went down in my brand new Jag-you-are and Harvey was driving us. Well, for some reason, Rhett decided that it would be fun to run the little window thingy that separates us from the driver part up and down and up and down and drive Harvey crazy - that was not cute you guys. I could tell Harvey was getting mad because his ears turned like super-red. Anyway, Rhett kept going, "Sometimes, when I want to make Harvey furious, I go like this." And I was like laughing so hard that I couldn't even tell him to stop. It was crazy. Anyway, Harvey dropped us at the theater, which was totally cute by the way, and we went in and saw Bucky and he was totally happy to see me. He was all hugging me and staring at my boobs like I knew he would, he can't help it. Anyway, I started meeting all my future inlaws and they are super-cute. When me and Rhett sat down in our awesome seats, some lady sat down next to Rhett and she was like, "How are you connected to the show?" I guess she knew we are famous and whatever. I was like, "The writer is my fiance." She looked stunned. I guess she was Bucky's Aunt Doody and she was like, "What?" So I repeated myself and she just goes, "What?" Like I guess she was deaf or something. So I said it really slow and then she started laughing. I bet she was drunk. I know me and Rhett were. Anyway, the show was totally wonderful and I was so proud of my fiance. After, Bucky told his sister to take us over to the reception, so we were walking along, being all fabulous and she goes, "How do you know my brother?" So I went, "He's my fiance." You should have heard her laughing. It was crazy. I guess his whole family is drunk. I mean, I know Bucky is a confirmed bachelor, and he lives with his really close friend named Jose, but I think it's just rude for his whole family to be laughing at our love.

Anyway, while we were talking to Aunt Doody and Uncle Punk, she mentioned the family trip to Destin Florida every year. I was all, "No. Nu-uh." I was furious. Everyone knows I hate Florida, so I guess this is going to be me and Bucky's first fight. Anyway, we are having dinner later this month, so we can make all the wedding plans and I can set him straight on Florida.

So anyway, it was getting late, so I called Harvey to tell him to bring the car around and his phone just rang and rang. That was weird. So I tried again - same thing. It was crazy. So like I have this theory that if someone doesn't answer the phone, you just call back until they do. So I kept calling him and calling him and after awhile, someone picked up and said, "Fuck off", then hung up. I was like, "What?" So I kept calling and by now it was getting really late and I wanted to get back to the compound. So finally my phone rang and it was Knute, "What is going on?" And I was all, "I wish I knew." So he goes that Harvey came back to the compound in the Jag and just parked it and went to his apartment over the garage and went to bed. He totally left us in Houston! So then I was hitting Rhett with my super cute sequined clutch and yelling, "It's all your fault." So I guess the valets were worried about Rhett, so they called the cops and then we had to explain everything to them and luckily we had a really super smart cop who took us to the Four Seasons where we stayed until we flew home today.

Now I have a total dilemma because I don't really feel like I can fire Harvey because Rhett was totally being a ass. I mean, I can't blame him for wanting to leave. And it's not like he stole my car or anything, he just went home. But Rhett is furious and wants me to fire him. I'm like, "I just found a driver and I am not about to screw this up." So anyway, I'm still not sure what I'm going to do, but Rhett is leaving pretty soon and I don't see any other people lined up to drive me around, so I think I'll keep Harvey for now.

My neighbor Monty was standing by my gate today when me and Rhett got back. It was a little scary. Rhett goes, "Sometimes, when I want to scare Monty, I go like this." And then he did something that wasn't even scary but I started laughing again and Monty just stared at us as we drove by. It was a little creepy now that I think about it!