It's so hard to be so awesome!

These are my new Choos. Awesome, right?

So here's the thing. Brookie came and her foot looked seriously effed up, so Knute took her to a orthodontist or some kind of bone doctor and turns out she has like a bone roaming around loose in her foot. Like, GROSS! I'm pretty sure bones are supposed to stay put.

Here's the thing about houseguests: they suck. It's just a whole lot more work for the staff and I have to be nice all the time and that just sucks. Plus Brookie is so bored she never leaves me alone. Like I'm seriously considering starting to run or something because I know she can't follow me. I mean, when I see her like 4 times a year, she's super-fun, but having her right next to me for days on end is like boring. And I feel like I can't really fight with her because she got some AWESOME painkillers when she went to the orthodontist so she's good for that. So what was I talking about? I might have to go to the apartment in NYC just to get away from her. Plus I've been solving all the problems this one friend of mine has and frankly, she has so many problems that I get tired of typing some nights because she lives in NYC so I'm fixing her life via email and IMs and crap like that. My fingers are killing me, like I think I have corporal chunnel or whatever. Some days it is hard to be so awesome. Like people want to live with me while their free-range bones settle down and other people want my awesome advice about relationships and jobs and crap that I don't even have. It's exhausting.

OMG, I totally got sidetracked talking about myself that I forgot to talk about The Incredible Hulk Hogan and his daughter Brooke who is not my houseguest, that's a different Brooke or Brookie -- it's super confusing. Anyway, did anyone see those pictures of The Incredible Hulk rubbing tanning oil on her butt? That was weird. Why would he do that? I mean, it's awesome that he's worried about skin cancer or whatever, but why was he touching her? My daddy hasn't even hugged me since I was like 4, much less applied a SPF to my butt. There's just no need for that. And not because I like to be awesomely tan, but because your butt falls into the parts of your body people shouldn't touch unless they buy you dinner or drinks first. My nanny taught me that.